i'm a prince somewhere to someone

I have absolutely nothing to do at work today. I will be sitting in front of this computer doing nothing at work today. I have nothing to do.

So I moved into a new house two days ago. The house is a mansion and I have a fireplace in my room. Reportedly, we're having a 4th of July party on the 4th of July. Come see my house. My brain feels like it's been hacked up into fragments. I'm thinking in fragments. I feel as though every sentence I write is a small fragment of my brain (which of course is always true). These really are horrible sentences.

I read two poems last week. I think they went over pretty well, but who knows. Z told me that he thought I got a good response from the crowd, "you got some laughs," he said. I can never tell if when people laugh they are actually laughing at what I'm reading or if they are laughing at my manner of speaking. I don't really think of my poetry as funny, necessarily, but it rarely broods. I get too excited when I write to write a sad poem. This is likely influenced, like many other aspects of my writing, by Koch and others. Koch is kind of seen as a comedic writer, but in response to this he claims,

"I don’t think the nature of my poetry is satirical or even ironic, I think its essentially lyrical...The comic element is just something that it seems to me enables me to be lyrical in the same way."

I think that's a good way to understand a writing style that focuses on an everydayness instead of a formal poetic approach (which means what exactly?). When we speak to each other, when we have conversations, consider when these instances are beautiful and exciting. Spontaneity results in happiness in language. I laugh at something that rises up from nowhere into a conversation not necessarily because it is funny per se, but rather because it is surprising and refreshing and comfortably uncomfortable. I keep saying that I'll post a poem, but I'm at work right now so I can't (I'm no slam, man). I will eventually.

I really think that I'm beginning to get over pessimism. I have a lot of cynical friends and sometimes it's just tiring to be around. Live and let live and love, mother fuckers. Stop blaming everyone else for your unhappiness and raise up people. Sorry, I'm not better than anyone else. There will be no more of that.

I wish I would have brought my ipod to work. I want to listen to Bonnie "Prince" Billy more. I love him too.